Looking back and what the past three years has taught me.
As my time as an undergraduate at Falmouth University comes to an end, I wanted to write a little reflective post about my time down in Cornwall.
This post will be a little look back at my years studying, what the past few years has taught me, and a lot of nostalgic photos.
I was on the phone to my dad the other day and I was saying how quickly these three years have gone – it feels like only yesterday I was driving up in my mum’s car to the university campus and moving into student halls. The first day I remember so vividly that the bit between then and now kind of seems like a blur.
But after a lot of tears, tattoos, laughs, drunk nights out and everything in between I am so proud of myself for how far I’ve come and I thought what better way to cement this memory than a blog post?
Looking back at my time at falmouth, I know one of the biggest things I will take away from this is how many amazing friends I have made. The girls who are some of my best friends now have been with me since day one (literally) and I can’t imagine my life without them.
Some people who I was really close with in first year I now pass on campus without a smile. But that’s okay, I’ve realised and accepted that not everyone is going to like you and that’s just how it is. You may clash or just not be each others cup of tea which is fine, because you have so many more people around you who love you and support you and would do anything for you.
Some of the days I spent with friends on the beach were some of the best days I’ve had. It was my birthday a couple of weeks ago and my boyfriend (who is a local) took me to the Lizard which is where he grew up. We went to this tiny beach with his dog and it was one of the best days for me. I always used to be a city girl and love London but now, my heart is wherever the sea is, and I don’t think of that as a bad thing. I still plan on working in London in the future but I know I will always return to the sea.
I have finally realised that I cared too much about my job whilst down in Falmouth. Don’t get me wrong I love working at St Michael’s – I love my colleagues, the hours work around my university work and I meet so many interesting people who stay at the hotel but I cared too much about a job when in reality I was only working to help support myself. I think there is a fine line between doing your job because you cared and doing your job because you cared about it too much and I passed that line too often. There were many times when I worked over doing uni work and, even though I have managed to stay on top of my deadlines and assignments, I’ve have to sacrifice a lot because of the job. I stopped going out with my friends, I worked myself to the point in which I would get up and do uni work, then go home and change for work, and then go to work, and then go back home to sleep. I exhausted myself and I forgot to have fun. The other night a few of my friends got together and we just chilled at home, played cards against humanity and just had a great night. I’ve missed just not caring about uni work or a job even if it’s only for the night. I would definitely recommend getting a job when you’re at university in order to help support yourself however I hope no one would do what I did and make your whole life revolve around university and a job. Remember, you’re at uni to learn but also have fun. So, actually have fun!
If you had told me on that first day of university that I’d be writing a screenplay (or even had the ability to write a whole feature film) for my dissertation I think I’d laugh in your face. I have always had a love for acting but I had never considered script writing or screenwriting until second year when I took that module. Even then, I never thought I’d have the ability to write a full on screenplay but I have and I am immensely proud of myself for being able to do it. It has almost come naturally to me – the whole process just makes sense and feels natural to me and I now have a clear idea of what I want to do when I graduate. I now have a love for screenwriting and writing stage plays. I don’t know how this love escalated so quickly but it just feels right.
What the past three years has taught me
I have finally found what I want to do, and along the way have accepted who I am as a person. In first and second year, I was still massively self-conscious of the way I looked and how others saw me but now my whole opinion of myself has changed. I no longer worry how I look (apart from the odd occasion), I am more focussed on proving who I am and what I can do through my work and my mental ability rather than how I look physically. I am happy with my body because I have friends around me who love me, an amazing boyfriend who treats me better than I could have ever asked and who loves me for who I am as opposed to just how I look and I have never been happier with myself. Yes I still have bad days, but who doesn’t. I have become so much better at coping with this bad days and, in all honesty, I think that is mainly thanks to Jake. Obviously, also becoming more open and speaking about my worries has helped as well, but sometimes when you have that one person come along and make you feel like there’s no one better than you, you really can feel 100% better.
I have learnt where my skills lie and I have used that knowledge to make the most of my time at university.
I have learnt to make the most of time at home with your family. Last summer I dedicated my life to working at the hotel (as I mentioned above). I was working 70 hours a week and I did not go home enough. I think when I went back for a week last christmas was the most time I’ve spent with family in the whole of 2018. I have learnt to make the most of that time you get with your family because sometimes, out of the blue, you will miss them terribly. You will want to quit uni and move back home just to be in the comfort of your mother’s arms. The one thing that has gotten me through those days is thinking back to enjoying the time I would spend with them. I’m naturally the kind of person who constantly needs to be doing something (probably the reason why I worked so much) but I’ve realised that it’s also good to sit down with your parents and dogs, and just not do anything for a while.
Moving 300 miles away has shown who my real or true friends are.
I’m not going to lie, I was a bit of a wreck in first year. I would hurt myself without meaning to and thought validation from a male was more important than anything. I had my heartbroken, it was real and it hurt but it isn’t as bad as it seems.
I remember my first collaborative project module in second year. I had to work with a randomly assigned group of people and was not only judged and mark as an individual, but also our collective work. At first I hated this, the group I worked with were so chilled out that I was stressing out for the four of us! From that first collaborative project module to the last one back in December, I have learnt how important collaboration is within the creative industry. I now realise how collaboration is used to create a successful project, whatever that project may be. Every one has different strengths, and the point of collaboration is to make the most of everyones various skills to create a stronger product at the end. Thank you to those three people who taught me what not to look for when collaborating with people and thank you to the company in my last module for teaching me how amazing collaboration can be when it’s done properly.
And finally, here are a couple more photos from the past few years.
Have a lovely weekend xx